Childhood Reflections
This article is a continuation of a previously written article entitled How to Get a Master’s Degree in Life. If you haven’t read it yet, I highly encourage you to check it out first and then return to this article.
In the article about obtaining a Master’s in Life, I mentioned that you need to construct and build 3 pillars to achieve an extraordinary life. You need to build a pillar of Health, a pillar of Wealth, and a pillar of Relationships. I'll walk you through the core of what I did to construct the pillar of Health.
Health was not something that came naturally to me. I’m not athletic by default and, in my youth, I did my best to avoid sports and competition as a whole. The idea of physically improving myself wasn’t something that crossed my mind or came naturally. Growing up, I also had health issues. One of my health issues required me to take a type of steroid. This resulted in me gaining an immense amount of weight when I was around the age of 10 or so. Needless to say, this crippled my self-esteem.
And, as a Boyscout at the time, being around other young men that were physically capable didn’t help my view of myself.
General physical fitness was a requirement. I’d watch as all of the other boys would crank out push-ups effortlessly. Some would easily do 30. Some would do 40. Some would knock out 100, no problem. And me? I could barely do one.
Beyond the practical benefits to one’s health, tackling this pillar will help you improve your overall self-esteem.
It’s difficult to feel great about yourself when there’s objective evidence showing you that you’re worse. As I grew older, I’d train in martial arts and grow taller, which helped hide my body fat under clothing. I didn’t look very fat but my body fat was still present. And I still felt like a loser because of it.
I had bitch-tits at the time, which some of my male friends made fun of. I felt soft and felt feminine. Deep down, I wanted to feel like a man. But I could never find out how to get that feeling. At one point, I even believed I had Gynecomastia.
As time went on, my self-image amongst several other factors, led me to struggle with depression. I believed that the body fat I had prevented me from finding a girlfriend. And something about not feeling strong made me feel less masculine overall. I felt deeply inadequate.
The Remedy
When I was, in college, while I was overweight, out of shape, and struggled to find lifting partners, I decided to mimic the routine of Dwayne Johnson (The Rock). I’d challenge myself to wake up early and lift using some routines of his that I found online. Eventually, some of the habits he had--like waking up early to lift--became a natural habit of mine and I no longer needed to actively copy him. For you, it doesn’t need to be such an extreme transition. 1. Find someone with a physique you admire. Use Instagram or Pinterest for specific models.
When I first did this, I used Pinterest as it was easier to find examples without getting too distracted with lifestyle porn.
Instagram can be an abyss that makes you unhappy. I don’t recommend overly comparing yourself to others. Especially if your self-esteem isn’t rock-solid.
2. Whoever you choose, steal their routine or copy them as much as possible (within reason) for at least 3 months.
The science of building habits tends to be somewhat inconsistent but it seems as though the longer you do an activity, the higher the probability it’ll turn into a default habit. About 3 months seems to be a sweet spot. Once you reach the goal you desire, I recommend buying clothes that complement the size you’re at.
Pay close attention to how you feel.
Notice the attention you may or may not be receiving from others.
Does it fit what you like?
And does the physique make you feel comfortable? At one point in my life, I tried to practice the habits of bodybuilding. I’d eat tons of calories and lift frequently. I tried the chicken breast and broccoli diet. At my heaviest, I was 198.6 lbs at a little over 5’10. While I kind of liked the feeling of lifting more weight, I didn’t like my face’s shape and being that heavy. Plus, I hated the routine. Micromanaging my macros and being so meticulous with my diet was horrible. I learned that being heavier and muscular to that degree wasn’t suitable for me. I also tried being very lean while sacrificing muscle. I didn’t like it either.
While my objective isn’t necessarily to be excessively intimidating, it’s mentally pleasing to know that you, as a male, can potentially be intimidating. And I didn’t see myself as potentially intimidating at such a thin size. Recently, I’ve found a good middle ground by being lean with a slightly muscular build. This usually puts me at around 170 lbs. While I'm still working on various aspects of my physique, I like the way my clothes fit, I like not having a round face, and I like the attention it brings. I’ll get told frequently that I’m in great shape. Understand that you need to figure out which physique works best for you. I know some people that prefer to be on the heavier side and maintain a rounder appearance similar to a football player on the defensive line. Others like to be extremely lean at the cost of some muscle. These people look like pro-bodybuilders or fitness models year-round. Again, while I don’t prefer either of these physiques, you need to figure out what works best for you. And this is why you need to experiment. You won’t know for sure what you like until after you’ve obtained it.
By the way, if you’re interested in improving your life dramatically and living your ideal lifestyle, it’s vital to build the 3 pillars of the good life. If you’re looking for a step-by-step guide to massively improve each pillar easily, check out my program, The Better Life BluePrint.
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